by Jim Nasium
Seventeen Days
A rather long poem about waiting, doing things you don't want to do, being sick, missing some one, and feeling a need to run away from it all...
Time goes by so slowly
when you're waiting for some thing
every day's the same for me lately
I could use a wild three day fling
some excitement and adventure
seeing things I never saw
I've only seventeen more days to wait
that's not very long at all
but the time goes by so slowly
there's not much to do here all
I'm tired of day dreaming about the past
writing about things I did and saw
I want to go some where new for awhile
I feel a need to get away
have an adventure some place I've never been
where I can go to play
but Monday it's the doctor
that did the radiation
he said he needs to see me
I may have to get radiation again
on Tuesday I have to give blood
they'll use when they operate
on Wednesday for most of the day
the hospital and I got a date
on Thursday I see the doctor
who put in my metal hip
he wants to check me out
give me a few tips
Friday it's the shopping
running out to pay bills
I need to get away for awhile
my spirit cries for some thrills
every day I got something to do
that only takes a little while
the rest of the day I've to myself
and you think that'd make me smile
but it's the same thing every day for me
there's not much I can do
it's hard to walk and people gawk
when they see me with a cane, it's true
even though I want to get away
I got something to do all the time
none of it's anything I want to do
but if I want to live then it looks like I'm
forced to do these things each day
that I don't really want to do
even though they don't take long at all
the rest of the day there's not much to do
I feel a need to get away
I have to have some fun
in seventeen days I'll be cut again
then hopefully the ordeal will be done
but no one knows for sure but God
and it's He who's in control
this is the hardest thing I ever had to do
it's hurts all the way to my soul
I've never felt so helpless
there's nothing I can do
the cancer takes it's own course
but one thing that is true
I do everything that I can do
I fight back every day
never the less my life's a mess
and I need to get away
but I can't go anywhere right now
I got to wait for my operation
then recovery and after care
none of which is going to be much fun
between now and the day I do get cut
there's not much for me to do
it's been the same thing every day
what's a guy to do
I long for one last adventure
a magical far away place
I also long to talk to you
play with you hair and touch your face
but you left me when you found out
I was sick and that I might die
you ran away as fast as you could
I have no reason why
what made you think I wouldn't need you
to help me try to get to get through
it's been a few months now that you've been gone
and I'm sick, alone and so blue
missing you and longing for adventure
makes me just want to run away
yet having so many appointments
it's important that I stay
since I need to turn my self in
to the hospital once again
in seventeen days they'll cut me open
then hopefully this ordeal will end
but time goes by so slowly
when you waiting for some thing
I'm up at dawn for no good reason
can't leave for work as morning birds sing
nothing is as I'd like it to be
every day it's the same old thing
I want to go away so bad
try to forget the mess I'm in
but time goes by so slowly
no matter where I'd be
feeling as helpless as I do right now
I wonder is there a future for me
in seventeen days I'll find out
if I'm to live or if I'll die
and no matter which way it goes
I'll be happy and I won't cry
I'm ready for what ever happens
I've made my peace with the Lord
every day it's the same old thing
and I'm getting pretty bored...
©2001 Jim Nasium
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